Why Am I Out Of Prison?

Here's a story that's hard to believe;
I've committed some heinous crimes
Then was granted an early reprieve
As reported so well in The Times.

I was once a subversive young hood
With a knack for demolishing stuff
And, hey, man, I'm not all that tough
But wreaked havoc wherever I could.

I'm now a respected old codger
With a rep as an artful Draft Dodger
All my friends in high circles of power
Say to them I'm the man of the hour.

I just can't help jumping with glee
And gloat over what's come to be
I'm a part of the system I hate
Yet can still about anarchy prate.

I'm the king of hypocrisy, peeps
And the Statue Of Liberty weeps
To bear witness to a villain as I
Stirring up such unrest on the sly.

You see, what it is that I do
Is to lecture at Anywhere U.
They scarf up my wisdom like flies
That drool over fresh-made cow pies.

What is funny is how I give talks
While I take all my students on walks
On a campus like ones I've blown up
In my days as an errant young pup.

My tune hasn't changed all that much
Decrying old values, say, such
As Liberty, Justice and Truth
In favor of acting uncouth.

My young fans are the wave of the future
All your dikes will not hold back the flood
And no needle can craft such a suture
To prevent there from being more blood.